Over the past few months I started developing a tormenting feeling that everything I do is Haram, and that my prayer is always incomplete, which drives me crazy; as I keep repeating each unit several times till I reach a point where I don’t really know how many Raka’s I’ve prayed. Same problem with Wudu. It’s not that I’m turning forgetful, but I’m being skeptic about whether I fulfill each Fard efficiently.
I face the same problem with Wudu.
Also given the fact that I’m a university student, I tend to deal with guys in normal everyday circumstances, but I return home with a distressing feeling that I did something wrong.
I know that part, if not all of this, might be the inner working of my mind, and I’m only able to put this into words because I’m alone and not engaged in any of such acts, which is helping me disconnect from this crazy and incessant dilemma. Is there a possible way out? Please help!
— From: Maysa
Answer offered by Dr. Farooq Hassan
Ph.D. in Islamic Studies (Usul-ul-Fiqh),University of Karachi
Assistant Professor of Islamic Studies and Ethical Behavior in Humanities Department - N.E.D. University of Engineering & Technology, Karachi.
No man of intelligence bases his life on a system that is inherently of a dubious nature. If you become a slave to your fears, they will become a hindrance to your understanding.
So, your focus is disturbed.
A person should divert all his thinking abilities to his Creator, who brought him from non-existence to glorious creation. Each one of us is endowed with conscience and a feeling of gut instinct. When in doubt, ask yourself, if you are right or wrong. If you feel comfortable with your response, go ahead and do it.
If you feel uncomfortable, don’t do it. Moreover, Allah judges you on your intentions.
Try to be attentive all the time and avoid distractions as much as possible, for example, when you start praying, imagine Allah is watching you and try to toally disconnect yourself from the surroundings and concentrate only on your actual prayer. Seek Allah’s help in putting your whole attention in whatever you are doing. Begin your work with Allah’s name and Inshaallah your doubts will be removed. (In the name of Allah Most Gracious, Most Merciful)
May be Shaytan (Satan) is putting the doubts in your mind to move you away from Allah’s path.
Dr. Farooq Hassan
Posted on August 24, 2011